Hearing Intact
by OtakuFangirlCrazyArtist
Summary: While Juushiro and Shunsui are in the Academy, Shunsui sustains a serious injury. The following is the account of it's repercussions.
1. Battlefield

A/N: The idea for this lovely thing came to me awhile ago. Not sure how long exactly, I've forgotten now. Anyway, it's ShunUki, pre-established relationship, Academy era.

This fic has a lot of dreams in it, and some may seem a bit OOC. However, in dreams we often do things we never would or could otherwise. I know I have, and you have too; even if you don't remember. So no complaints about the dream actions! Okay, rant over n.n

This story was also greatly aided by music. The first chapter was inspired by _Evil Angel_ by Breaking Benjamin and _Mad World _by Adam Lambert.

Reviews will be awarded with virtual chocolate! :-D

* * *

Chapter 1: Battlefield

The Menos had come out of nowhere. One minute Shunsui and the four other Academy students were making their way back to the school and the next; the biggest Hollow any of them had ever seen was rearing out of the trees. The student with the fastest shunpo step ran ahead for reinforcements. The other four, including Shunsui, stayed behind to hold it off the best they could. They slashed at the massive thing; trying to keep it in one place, at least. It was easier said than done. No matter where they cut it, the Menos showed no signs of stopping; only becoming more enraged. Its scream echoed off the distant mountains, calling more Hollows of smaller caliber to its aid.

Shunsui turned to face these new enemies with trepidation. He killed four before his zanpakuto was caught between the claws of a fifth, more skilled opponent. He managed to twist the blade free, with a wrenching screech of metal, and aimed for the mask. The Hollow moved so that instead of cleaving the white face, Shunsui's zanpakuto bit deep into it's shoulder. Screaming its fury, the Hollow slashed at him and Shunsui was unable to get his sword free in time. Yet he clutched the hilt as he was thrown into one of the trees in the forest surrounding the battle.

Shunsui could feel blood trickling out of him, though from where he wasn't sure. His thoughts were fuzzy, his vision blurred and dimly he knew his head had snapped back with the impact. Shifting his sword arm gingerly, he was relieved to find that it still worked. So did his other arm, and his right leg. He had landed on his left leg, however, and it still rested under the full weight of his body at an awkward angle. Most likely, it was broken. Attempting to move anything else caused his torso to burn and sharp pains to lance across his chest. He looked down, only dimly recognizing the shreds of his shirt and the bloody mess of his skin. Looking at it made his head spin more than it already was, so he watched the battlefield instead. But he couldn't concentrate, something was dragging at his senses. Blackness closed around his eyes even as he fought to stay conscious. And then he was falling away from it all.

* * *

Juushiro woke with a start. Someone was knocking insistently on the door. Gathering his sea-green yukata around himself with a small shiver, he got up and opened the thin door, only to be bonked on the nose by the over-eager knocker.

"I'm sorry, Juushiro-sempai!" An assistant Juushiro recognized from the infirmary looked horrified and lowered his fist quickly. He had always been one of the more energetic ones.

"It's fine..." Juushiro said, waving one hand dismissively and rubbing his nose with the other. "What's so urgent?"

"Oh, right!" the assistant cried. In Juushiro's opinion, it was much too late at night for this sort of enthusiasm. "Unohana-sempai said I should come and get you. Kyouraku-sempai's in the infirmary, he doesn't look so good."

Juushiro's blood ran cold. Shunsui had been on a mission. He had thought it odd that his roommate hadn't returned yet, but he wrote it off as bad weather or some such insignificant thing. He had not expected Shunsui to come back injured and "not looking so good".

"Wait here a minute. I'll get dressed."

Two minutes later, Juushiro was in his uniform and half-running through the halls of the Academy behind the infirmary assistant. When they arrived, it was noisier than usual; healers bustled from bed to bed of injured students, five of them. Three were from the squad Shunsui had set out with, the other two were older students who'd been part of the reinforcements. Shunsui wasn't in the main ward, so the assistant lead him to one of the private rooms in the back. Unohana-sempai was already there, bending over the single bed. Juushiro crossed the room in three quick strides, moving to stand on the opposite side of the bed as Unohana. She didn't look up as he joined her, intent on healing the lacerated torso.

Juushiro bit his lip as he saw the extent of the damage. Shunsui was covered in blood, most of it presumably his own. One of his legs looked broken, and what looked like claw marks were gouged deep into his chest and stomach. Unohana was working the most intently on those. Juushiro took the fact that they were no longer bleeding to be a good sign. After a few minutes of tense, focused silence; Unohana looked up. She smiled wearily, brushing stray hair from her eyes and leaving a smear of blood on her forehead.

"How bad is it?" As soon as the question left his mouth, Juushiro knew it was a stupid one.

"Bad," Unohana confirmed his thoughts, "The lacerations were the worst, though I've healed the worst of those. He has several broken ribs, his left leg is broken and he has a major concussion." She sighed. "I would do more now, but his system is struggling to heal itself. Kidou would only stress it more."

Juushiro nodded numbly. "Will he be okay?" He asked quietly.

Unohana hesitated. "Honestly... I don't know."

"But you can heal him, can't you? Maybe not tonight, but..." he trailed off hopefully.

"Yes. I can work on his injuries more tomorrow, perhaps."

"Has he woken up yet?" Juushiro asked.

"No. I don't think he'll be waking soon."

"But he's not..." Juushiro swallowed, unable to ask if Shunsui had or would survive.

"He slipped into a coma on the way back to the Academy."

Hollowly, Juushiro absorbed this new, unwelcome fact. After a moment he asked; "_Can_ he wake up?"

"Oh, yes," Unohana reassured him, "I think, in time, he will. He may regain consciousness enough to hear us soon, or he could be listening right now."

Juushiro nodded. So Shunsui would hear, but not be able to respond. Maybe, if he wasn't too close to death.

Seeing the far-away, pained look on Juushiro's face, Unohana squeezed his shoulder in a reassuring gesture. She smiled when he looked at her, and he smiled back. It was forced, but it was better than nothing. She set about cleaning and dressing the wounds, then covering Shunsui's wrapped chest with multiple blankets. Juushiro helped, gently tucking the edges of each layer around the injured frame. When her work was done, Unohana left with the promise that she would come back and heal Shunsui more the next day.


	2. Awake, Asleep, Apprehension

A/N: Music for ch.2 was _Bleed (I Must Be Dreaming) _by Evanescence, and _March of Mephisto _by Kamelot (for the dream). PM me if you want to talk about the meaning about this or any of the dreams.

* * *

Chapter 2: Awake, Asleep, Apprehension

Shunsui was waking slowly. He could feel the warmth of sleep surrounding him, pulling him back down. It was peaceful, simply floating in this endless blackness. He didn't want to go. But something was pulling him away from this comforting stupor, towards light and pain and wakefulness. Against his will, he found himself becoming slowly aware once more of his body and his injuries. He didn't want to go. He fought it, reaching desperately for the consuming blackness. Yet no matter how hard he fought, he was being pulled inexorably up and away. He didn't want to go.

The sound of a familiar voice was the first thing Shunsui became aware of. Juushiro was speaking somewhere close by, but his brain couldn't process the words yet. He tried to extend his reiatsu, to reach out to the other student. Nothing. Again Shunsui tried, pushing and pummeling his own spiritual pressure in an attempt to move it. He couldn't project it at all.

If he couldn't move his reiatsu, perhaps his physical body would respond. Shunsui tried opening his eyes. His lids felt like stone, immobile and impassive. He tried moving a finger, the next smallest motion he could think of. No response. No matter how hard he concentrated, how much mental effort and willpower he put into it, he couldn't move a muscle. Fear gripped Shunsui as he realized he was trapped. He lay helpless, unable to move or communicate.

Cool fingers grasped Shunsui's hand, startling him. Juushiro squeezed his hand gently, a reassuring gesture that Shunsui wished he could return. The touch stilled his panic for the moment, allowing him to relax enough to process the conversation Juushiro was having.

"...and I think it should be safe to heal him more tomorrow," a voice Shunsui recognized vaguely was saying.

"Thank you, Unohana-sempai," Juushiro said. He sounded so worn out; making Shunsui want to chide him into getting more sleep. The two students were silent for a moment, and all Shunsui could hear was the faint but steady beep of what must be the heart monitor. "Do you think he can hear us?" Juushiro asked quietly.

"It's possible. His wounds healed well today, so I wouldn't be surprised if he was conscious."

"Would he be in pain?"

"I doubt it. The kidou should hold it off, and we can put him on a painkiller, in case he's conscious." Shunsui hadn't, in fact, felt any of his injuries very strongly yet and hoped he didn't for awhile.

"Good," Juushiro said in relief. They were silent for another minute before Unohana said: "I've done all I can for today. You should get some sleep as well, Ukitake-kun."

"I'll sleep here..." Juushiro responded automatically.

"Alright." She didn't push him into going back to his room, knowing it would be futile. Shunsui heard a door open and shut, then all was silent. Juushiro sighed shakily, stroking stray hairs from Shunsui's forehead. The silence stretched, agonizing to Shunsui's blindness and paralysis.

Suddenly, he felt a weight on the bed beside him. A warm body pressed itself to his side and Juushiro rested his head against Shunsui's shoulder. He sighed again, more sleepily this time. Shunsui listened to the breathing slowly deepening close to his ear and wished he could wrap his arms around Juushiro and hold him close. But wishing would do him no good, he realized, and so Shunsui slowly fell asleep as well.

* * *

_Shunsui stood in the middle of a deserted street, watching a parade of Hollows pass by. Their masks stood out in the half-light, making the picture somehow more haunting. He reached for his zanpakuto, only to find with dismay that it had left his side. The naked blade lay abandoned on the other side of the street. Yet it seemed as though he didn't need it. The Hollows didn't spare him a glance, merely continued their slow journey past him. As an experiment -for he couldn't be hurt in a dream- Shunsui ran into the street, directly in front of a Hollow. It stopped, seeing that there was something obstructing its path. _

_ The white mask, in the shape of a grotesque bird, practically glowed. The holes where the eyes would have been were oddly empty, devoid of a Hollow's usual aura of menace. It stared at him apathetically before walking slowly around him and onward after it's kin. Shunsui stepped back from the path as more Hollows approached; wondering offhandedly at their blank eyes devoid of malice. _

_ He watched them for awhile longer before a figure different from the rest walked before him. White hair blew about the pale face in a slight breeze that rustled the familiar Academy uniform. Shunsui called out to him, but Juushiro made no sign that he had heard; continuing down the road dispassionately. Determined to catch his attention, Shunsui ran into the road in front of him, halting Juushiro. The white-haired young man merely looked at him. Shunsui touched the familiar cheek, wanting to be sure it was really him. It certainly seemed to be. The face was the same. Except... Juushiro's bright hazel eyes were gone. All that remained were white orbs devoid of color; staring out at Shunsui without recognition._

_ Helplessly, Shunsui stepped to the side, allowing Juushiro to pass. The frail-looking student walked past him without acknowledgement, traveling at an unbroken pace before slowing inexorably and, suddenly, vanishing. Shunsui ran forward to the spot where he had been. There no sign of Juushiro's existence, only dirt road and Hollows on either side. No matter how hard he looked, Shunsui could find no trace of him. Reluctantly, Shunsui made his way back down the road. _

_ He stood dumbly, watching the seemingly endless stream of Hollows marching past him, single file. He didn't know how long he stood there, but at some point he felt a cool breath of wind behind him. It toyed with the edges of his uniform and tossed his short, curly hair about his head. Shunsui was surprised to hear himself laughing, and turned to face the wind, arms open wide to accept it. And as he tilted his head back to embrace the feeling, he caught a glimpse of white in the upper-story window of one of the shabby buildings. _

_ Barely daring to hope, Shunsui threw open the front door and climbed the dark stairwell without fear of losing his footing. The steps creaked beneath his bare feet and cobwebs hung on the wall he used as a guide. When he arrived at the top of the stairs, he was confronted by a single door. Warm light leaked out under the frame. Shunsui tried the handle, smiling as it turned. He stepped into the room beyond. _

_ The chamber that greeted him was completely bare, brown walls and floor in an identical state of uncleanliness. The golden light came from a candle that floated, unsupported, at the center of the ceiling. It didn't flicker or threaten to go out, despite the open window and the wind that whistled softly through the room. Juushiro stood at the window, his back to Shunsui. The dreamer approached him eagerly and made to put his arms around the daydreaming young man. Juushiro turned quickly. _No, you mustn't, _he cautioned. _

Why not?_ Shunsui asked, lowering his arms regretfully._

You mustn't, _Juushiro repeated._

I thought you were gone, _Shunsui whispered._

I was, _Juushiro replied calmly, _I'm not anymore.

But... _Shunsui lost the energy to protest. He moved to stand next to the other student. _

Look, _Juushiro commanded. He pointed to the endless procession of Hollows beneath the window. Shunsui watched with him, smiling slightly as the wind ruffled their hair and clothes. The Hollows marched and marched, countless hours passing in the blink of an eye. Flower petals of every color began to fall. White, crimson, pink, lavender, forest green, soft brown, sky blue, black, bright yellow, royal purple, warm orange, ocean blue... They fell more and more numerously, mixing with the wind to create a tornado of brilliant color. It spun and spun, hurting Shunsui's eyes but pulling his gaze inexorably. And still, the Hollows marched...

* * *

_

Shunsui woke abruptly. The faint beeping of the heart monitor poked at his ear, while Juushiro's deep breathing was also discernible. He still lay curled up next to Shunsui, sleeping soundly. Shunsui would have smiled; the feeling of Juushiro next to him was comforting, much more so than anything else he had ever felt.

A soft knock sounded at the door. Juushiro woke suddenly, sitting up sharply. "C'mon in..." he called sleepily. The door opened and Unohana said, "No need to get up for me." Juushiro had indeed been slowly swinging his legs over the edge of the bed.

"No, I should..." he yawned widely, "What time is it?"

A smile in her voice, Unohana replied; "It's around ten in the morning."

Juushiro sighed. "Guess I'm not going to class today."

"You don't have to," Unohana reassured him.

"But I should..." His tone was doubtful.

"I've arranged for your work to be brought here. I told Yamamoto-sensei that Kyouraku-kun needed someone to stay with him, and I can't be here all the time. We agreed that you wouldn't mind."

Juushiro laughed. "Thank you, sempai. You're a wonder."

"No need to thank me," Unohana said briskly, though Shunsui was sure she was blushing, "I knew you wouldn't leave anyway, even if you were missing class."

A short silence followed, in which Juushiro's warmth left the hospital bed altogether, but stayed around Shunsui's hand. Slowly, a cool sensation washed through his torso, making Shunsui sleepy. He assumed Unohana was healing him, but he'd never had this much kidou in his system. It dragged at his mind, sending him into a half-waking stupor. Sleep was calling... and going unanswered. Shunsui fought the urge for unconsciousness, he had only just woken up and... At that train of thought, the dream came rushing back. Juushiro's blank eyes and a whirlwind of petals floated in the black space of his mind; causing a strangely ambivalent feeling.

The cool sensation stopped abruptly. Shunsui was startled out of his recollections, feeling as though he'd been abruptly sobered by a cold bucket of water. After a moment, he made the connection that Unohana had stopped healing him.

"Is something wrong?" Juushiro asked, slightly alarmed.

"No... well, sort of. His injuries are responding well to the kidou."

"That's good."

"Yes. But using it is also sending him deeper into the coma."

"How is that possible?" Juushiro asked, genuinely confused.

"When the body sends itself into a coma, it's giving itself time to heal. In this case, Kyouraku-kun's body is perceiving the kidou as another attack, and so is trying to protect itself."

_My body's stupid..._ Shunsui thought in exasperation.

"Hm. I think that makes sense," Juushiro said after a minute of thought.

"So there's nothing I can do but heal in little bits, and risk driving his mind deeper."

Juushiro sighed. "If it works, and his body heals, will he wake up?"

"I'm not sure. It depends upon a lot of things, all of them too complex to explain at the moment. But I'll try my best to make sure he wakes." Unohana assured him.

Juushiro said nothing, squeezing Shunsui's hand for comfort.

"We should contact his family," Unohana suggested gently, "They might want to see him."

_Oh no, Don't do that... _Shunsui thought helplessly.

"From what he's told me, I don't know if they'll come..." Juushiro spoke roughly what Shunsui was thinking.

"Still. They should know what's happened to their son," Unohana said.

Juushiro said nothing. He must have nodded though, because Unohana left the room shortly after.

* * *

Shunsui hadn't yet been this frustrated by his dumb paralysis. He hadn't really expected Juushiro to argue, which was fine, seeing as it went against his nature. But the thought of his parents, possibly his brother, in this room with him unable to move or speak honestly scared him. He feared not being able to protect Juushiro against them. It wasn't that he feared for the other student's physical safety, on the contrary. But his family could be rough to people lower than them on the social ladder. That is to say, people who weren't very rich nobles. Though whether they would take any notice of Juushiro was a significant question. Still, the fear seemed to be legitimate.

Shunsui's thoughts swirled round and round, running dysfunctionally on the same wheels of worry. He slowly tired himself out, falling asleep again despite the possibility of another odd dream.


	3. Mother Dearest

A/N: Music inspiration for Chapter 3 came from _Here We Are _by Breaking Benjamin (the dream), _So Cold _by Breaking Benjamin and _On the Arrow_ by AFI.

* * *

Chapter 3: Mother Dearest

_ Shunsui leaned against a wall, facing the hall that had manifested before him. He was in the foyer of his family's manor; a room overflowing with history and color (opposing objects, in Shunsui's opinion). Tapestries lined the walls, their vibrant threads depicting local and foreign landscapes from each of the four seasons. Flowers spilled, voluptuous, from round vases set on the small tables that lined the hall. The ceiling held less of the color of the decorations, for it was a century-old mural depicting the Kyouraku family lineage. _

_ Despite the familiarity of the room, something was off and it took Shunsui a minute to put his finger on it. The abundance of servants that usually bustled about the hall were strangely absent. So, too, were the smattering of lesser noblemen who often loitered in other's manors. In fact, Shunsui's only companions were his parents, who sat in two chairs in front of him. Their backs were to him, and their attention was focused on the empty hall._

_ Bored with this never-changing scene, Shunsui stared up at the ceiling. His vision seemed increased somehow, because he saw that some of the paint had begun to chip. As he studied the imperfect section, pieces began to fall. Only a few, inconsequential enough that his parents didn't notice. Shunsui stood up and walked the few paces to where the chips of pigment lay. He picked one up carefully, trying not to break it. It was large, almost as big as his palm. One side was white, but upon turning it over; Shunsui found a face staring back at him. It didn't seem odd to him at all, that Juushiro's face had been among those of his ancestors. _

Shunsui. Put that down, _his father commanded from his seat._

It's only a chip of paint... _Shunsui argued, slipping it secretively into the inside pocket of his shirt. _

Throw it out, _his father ordered, _The next chance you get.

_Shunsui nodded offhandedly, not intending to actually do as his father said._

Come sit down, _his mother said, _Wait for your brother with us.

_Shunsui obeyed reluctantly, resuming his former position on the floor. They waited for some time, Shunsui's eyes constantly darting about the ever-empty hall. Slowly, almost too gradually for him to notice, the flowers began to lose their color. The tapestries dulled and the jewels on his mother's dress dimmed. After what seemed like hours, the hall was colored in shades of gray and black, a mere imitation or sketch of the vibrant reality. Shunsui looked around, desperate for color. It flashed sometimes, at the edges of his vision, but when he turned to look everything was still greyscale. _

_ Without warning, the double doors opened. A brilliant shaft of light burned Shunsui's eyes, and he had to shut them until the door closed. Yet when he chanced opening them, Shunsui found himself hovering just below a very fluffy cloud high above the manor's roofs. Panic gripped him as he realized how dangerous this was. Heights had never bothered him, but this was higher than he'd ever been. Not even birds came this high. It wasn't natural. And though Shunsui wasn't sure who he was anymore, he knew with iron certainty that he was not, in fact, a bird. _

_ Gingerly, Shunsui uncrossed his legs. He didn't plummet toward the ground, as he expected. Experimentally, he took a step. Then another. And soon, he was sprinting across the blue spring sky. He laughed with the joy of being able to speed along as fast as he wanted, to cover all the distance he could think of, without tiring or even losing his breath. _

_ After a moment, he began to notice flashes of gray on the edges of his peripheral vision. Panic rose as Shunsui recognized the greyscale coloring that had invaded his home. He felt the sudden, overwhelming need to feel solid ground beneath his feet again. _

_ And just like that, he was falling. Tumbling through the fresh air with absolutely nothing to stop his fall. His clothes and hair flapped in the wind the drop created. The chip of paint he'd salvaged, the one with Juushiro's face on it, flew away from him; floating serenely towards the sky. He would have grabbed for it, but the ground was close now; Shunsui braced himself for the impact...

* * *

_

He woke suddenly. Unable to open his eyes, it took Shunsui several minutes to be sure that he was not, in fact, plummeting to his doom. The conclusion was a comforting one.

He wondered vaguely what time it was. Juushiro's cool fingers were entwined with Shunsui's own, so he assumed it was day; though one never knew with Juushiro. He could also hear the faint scratching of a pen. Of course he was doing schoolwork. Though, when pressed, Shunsui couldn't think of much else he could be doing.

Left with nothing to do, Shunsui pondered those strange dreams he'd been having since he'd been in the infirmary. Was it something in the water? Or, more correctly, the IV fluid? Did he have a fever? Was his subconscious just having fun with him?

The sound of the door opening interrupted his musings. Shunsui listened hard and discerned a very familiar tread. His mother had arrived.

* * *

Juushiro was concentrating on his homework when an unfamiliar reiatsu approached. It had the duality of satin and daggers, with a breath of fresh spring air confusing it all. As the person approached, Juushiro relinquished Shunsui's hand and waited. In a matter of seconds, the door swung open and the visitor arrived.

Juushiro's first impression of Shunsui's mother was excess. Her kimono was of the finest quality silk; precious metals and jewels sparkled from her ears, fingers, wrists, neck and even ankles. His next impression was color. The kimono was a dark shade of orange, one he couldn't quite name, with a pattern of flower petals. They fell and swooped around her frame in an array of every shade you could imagine. Juushiro noticed tiny jewels winking from folds in the abundant fabric. Her jewelry glittered with gemstones; diamonds, tiger's and cat's eye, amethyst, mother of pearl, opal, garnet, peridot, pearl, onyx and turquoise were set in chains of silver, copper and gold.

Once he got over the overwhelming aspects of her attire, Juushiro realized that Lady Kyouraku was actually quite nice-looking. She had a tall, willowy figure that was very unlike her son's, and her dark hair was piled in loops about her head. More jewels glittered in the pins holding it together. The satiny locks framed a face as tan as her son's, with wide blue eyes. A small, pert nose was set above curved lips accented by rogue. Her whole person commanded attention and once received; it demanded respect.

Juushiro stood as she approached him, not allowing himself to waver as her icy gaze pierced his being. The noblewoman's eyes were razor-sharp as she studied his face.

"Who are you?" Lady Kyouraku asked. Her voice was soft, with an almost raspy quality. It was not the dulcet tones that would have matched her appearance.

Juushiro bowed and introduced himself. "Ukitake Juushiro."

"Why are you here?" she asked coldly.

"The healers asked me to stay with him," Juushiro explained politely, "In case his condition changes."

"I see," Lady Kyouraku replied stiffly. She stepped closer, turning to face the bed. Minutes passed in silence as she scrutinized her son's immobile figure. "At least he's not his brother," she remarked presently, "If he dies, we'll still have an heir."

The callous indifference in that statement stunned Juushiro into momentary speechlessness. How could that be the biggest concern on her mind? Did she not care at all for her son's wellbeing, or even his life? The fact that he even had to ask himself those questions irked Juushiro beyond measure. Perhaps that was what drove him to say, "And you will have lost a son."

It was impolite, disrespectful, perhaps even arrogant of him to say it; but for once, Juushiro didn't care. He met Lady Kyouraku's gaze steadily as she turned to look at him, indignation sparking in those frosty cerulean orbs.

"I have already lost him," she said bitterly, "I lost him when he turned his back on our family and came here. I lost him when he refused to follow our way of life. I have already lost my son, Ukitake Juushiro; so do not let your judgment of me be so quick and harsh."

Taken aback, Juushiro dropped his eyes. His anger was quickly replaced by shame. No words of apology or argument came to his lips; he kept them closed.

"Perhaps I should have raised him differently," Lady Kyouraku mused, gazing down at Shunsui again as though Juushiro was not there, "But how else would I have done it...?" Silence reigned again before she said, "No matter. There is no changing the past." She stepped away from the bed and looked up at Juushiro; her gaze lancing across the two inch difference in their heights. "I trust you'll contact me if he wakes."

"Of course," Juushiro assured her quietly.

In a swirl of silk and color, Lady Kyouraku left the room, carelessly letting the door slam behind her. Once she was gone, Juushiro sat down heavily. Sighing, he rested his forehead against his palms and shut his eyes. He didn't want to think anymore; he was tired of the uncertainty that had plagued his life these last few days.

He'd always accepted Shunsui's statements of his family's indifference as fact, never stopping to question their motives or feelings. While it was true that Shunsui's mother had shown astounding callousness, she had also shown regret. Didn't that say that she wasn't as bad as Shunsui had always told him? Juushiro sighed again. He didn't know what to think. When it came to Shunsui's family, he'd allowed himself to see their situation and role as black and white, not the shades of gray he knew the world to be. It must have been because he loved Shunsui, that he was so biased about it. Still, he couldn't help but feel guilty that he hadn't considered all the angles of the situation.

Night fell as these thoughts twirled maddeningly in Juushiro's head. Finally, abandoning his homework as a bad job, the worn student curled up next to Shunsui on the hospital bed. It was rather cramped, but Juushiro was convinced that this was a small price to pay for warmth. Slowly, he fell asleep to the steady rhythm of the heart monitor and Shunsui's soft breathing.

* * *

To say that Shunsui was surprised at his mother's admission- that she should have raised him differently- was an understatement. The very fact that she regretted anything about his childhood was something he'd never considered.

That was a small concern, though, compared to his frustration. If he had never been injured in the first place, Juushiro wouldn't have ever met his mother. If only he could speak; Shunsui knew he would have been able to convince Unohana-sempai not to contact his family. Somehow, all his frustration now revolved around Juushiro never meeting his mother.

Maybe that was unfair of him. It wasn't like Juushiro hadn't stood up for himself, for Shunsui. It wasn't like he couldn't take care of himself. And some of Shunsui's frustration was built up from not being able to do anything. He ached to touch Juushiro again; to tell him it would all be alright. Even if that was a lie.

Shunsui would have smiled, as he felt Juushiro climb into the the hospital bed next to him. He listened to the smaller student sleep for awhile, not allowing himself to fall asleep. Sleep brought dreams, and Shunsui was very tired of those. They caused him to think more than he already did.

But slowly, against his will, he drifted into the blackness of slumber.


	4. Night Pictures

A/N: Music for chapter 4 was _Into the Ocean _by Blue October for Shunsui's dream and _Medicate _by Breaking Benjamin for Juushiro's. I apologize that this chapter is all in italics, if it irks you.

* * *

Chapter 4: Night Pictures

_ Shunsui hit the water with a splash. He sank fast, courtesy of his surprise at being tossed into the ocean. It seemed as though there should have been something he could do to prevent this... what was it, again? Something to do with moving his arms... _

_ Oh yes, he remembered now. In a few smooth strokes, Shunsui had made his way to the surface and was taking in oxygen gratefully. He had to use his arms and legs to stay afloat, and he felt rather silly, but stopping wasn't an option._

_ Looking about, he saw no boats or land anywhere. He turned full circle, but the water held no change. Above him, the stars glittered imperviously and a bone-white full moon shone down on his predicament. Shunsui peered into the water around him, trying to gauge its depth. He couldn't see very far by the light of the moon, but he caught a glimpse of two fish, playfully chasing each other through the weeds below him. _

_ Without any warning, Shunsui was dowsed in darkness. Confused, he looked around to find that the moon had disappeared. His source of light extinguished, he began to feel the cold the ocean brought more sharply. A weak wind brushed his cheek and he shivered, wishing the water would disappear. It was all very irritating, Shunsui thought in exasperation, and how had he even ended up here in the first place? _

_ As he stewed over the situation, Shunsui failed to notice the waves gradually rocking higher. He did notice, however, when they got strong enough to lap at his chin. The wind had intensified too; it was buffeting his head and neck, making him colder. Rain began to fall in large, stinging drops as Shunsui fought for balance in the turbulent water. _

_ Waves rocked all around him, pulling and pushing all at once so that he could barely tell which way was which. Finally, after he struggled uselessly for awhile, a wave managed to knock Shunsui under the water. As soon as his whole body was submersed, he forgot everything. Shunsui's mind simply went blank as the water closed in. He supposed he was drowning. But what did that mean? Wasn't he already close to death, somewhere else? Impossible, Shunsui reassured himself, no one can be in two places at once._

_ With no warning, a pair of fish swam past him. They wove through the water with such grace that Shunsui was entirely distracted from the whole drowning dilemma. He watched, entranced, as they flitted around him playfully, long tails and fins fluttering in each other's wakes. They continued around him in an ever-tightening circle, finally buoying him to the surface of the ocean. _

_ As his head broke the surface, Shunsui gasped for air. When he had his bearings, he saw that the sun had risen, giving everything a dark pink cast. The ocean was unchanged except for the color; no boats or land could be seen. Shunsui looked into the water below him, but the fish had disappeared. The realization came to him that he was all alone. There was no one here to help him, no land to reach. Though the ocean was still, a wave of hopelessness washed over him. He was stuck, and what was the point? He couldn't see one as surely as he couldn't see land._

_ Determined now, Shunsui dove beneath the still water. The depth was merely blackness, but he struck out towards it. Down, down, down he swam; deeper and deeper into the watery abyss. Gradually, he felt himself weakening. He was sinking now, without any effort at all. His vision grew fuzzy, not that he could see much to begin with. Shunsui drifted further and further through the blackness as his awareness slipped away...

* * *

_

_ Juushiro strides down a dirty street, watching doorways on either side of him. Urchins and runaways lurk in shadows or alleyways, glaring at anyone who dares approach them. The twilight air is crisp, though Juushiro is too tense to enjoy it. This is a dangerous neighborhood; he can feel the violent tension in the air. _

_ Simultaneously, Juushiro notices two things that make him feel a little safer walking through this slum. The first is Shunsui's presence behind him. He can sense the alert protectiveness the bigger boy holds in his expansive reiatsu. The second thing is the knife concealed at his wrist. By the feel of the handle, Juushiro can tell that it's his father's; the one he always used to gut the fish they caught from the cove at home. He hopes he won't have to use it, but one never knows, he supposes. _

_ They walk for awhile longer before Juushiro recognizes the sudden absence of people. Shutters and doors are being closed and bolted; street rats creep into their secret places. Disconcerted, Juushiro stops walking and turns to ask Shunsui's opinion on the change. But there isn't anyone there. Juushiro's comrade has simply vanished. _

_ With nothing to back him up but a fishing knife, Juushiro slinks into the shadows under an eave. Before long, he sees the cause of the citizens' disappearance. A small group of soldiers, about five or six of them, are making their way down the deserted street. Each one holds menace in their every movement; it is clear they aren't picky who gets in their way- as long as they have someone to gang up on. It is too late for Juushiro to hide before they see him, so he steps out into the street. He is a student of the Academy, after all, that ought to get him somewhere. _

_ In under five seconds the soldiers have converged on him, demanding to know who was he, what business did he have here, who did he think he was standing there bold as brass._

I'm a student of the Shinou Academy, _Juushiro explains quickly. But the rest of his explanation is forestalled by laughter. _

That's what all the street rats say! _the soldiers leer, _They're someone important who'll have none of this nonsense! We're taking you in, student or no... _And on go the taunts and laughter as they push, pull and generally force Juushiro to walk in the middle of their little circle. Confusion grips Juushiro at their words. It's obvious that he's a student, the uniform should be proof... _

_ But as he looks down at himself, Juushiro sees no uniform. He sees the rags, bruises, scrapes and general dirt of an urchin. How had that happened? And when? Had it been when Shunsui disappeared? Or had he ever been wearing it in the first place? It didn't matter, really, Juushiro thinks. And wondering won't bring it back. The more important question is, could he escape from these soldiers? He's outnumbered, even with his knife. His best hope, Juushiro realizes, is to go along with them and wait for the opportunity to escape._

_ The facility is white and gleaming with sterility, the most threatening thing Juushiro could think of. His mind is foggy with something the doctors gave him; he struggles against the haze around his thoughts. The soldiers who had captured him are gone, along with his father's fishing knife. He can feel Shunsui's presence though, a comforting, steady thing. _

_ Juushiro reaches out in the direction of Shunsui's reiatsu, longing to make sure he is real. Or at least, he tries to reach out. His hands are bound with some kind of cuff, the kind that increases the institutional feel of the place. Still, Shunsui must see the effort, because he strokes the hair away from Juushiro's brow and touches his cheek fleetingly. Juushiro sighs a little, longing to fall asleep with those strong, warm arms around him. _

_ The touch recedes and he feels the cuffs around his wrists fall away. Confused, he sits up and looks around. There is no one there; only a faint breath of wind slipping a thought into his ear._

Run.

_ Gingerly, he gets out of the bed and spies a window across the room. Quickly crossing to it, he finds the fishing knife lying innocently on the sill. Snatching it up, Juushiro throws open the unlocked window and jumps a single story to the ground, sprinting away before the alarm can sound._

_ He runs through the forest; leaves flash past him in blurs of orangeredyellowbrown that he barely has time to identify. Ahead, he sees an opening in the trees and quickens his pace, sure that this holds the answer to his escape. He passes the opening and the canyon yawns just in front of his flying feet. He grasps at the now-spindly trees that hang close to the edge, stopping his inexorable course down the precipitous slope. But he's still slipping, and before long the tree has given up its tenuous hold on the rocks and is sliding with him..._

_ Juushiro looks up frantically, searching for some hopeful sign. Empty sky, deserted woods- There! Shunsui is standing across the canyon from him, watching. Juushiro opens his mouth to call out to him, but the bigger man half-turns and disintegrates with a sudden, violent breath of wind. _

_ And still Juushiro slides down, grasping at nothing now, because there is nothing there-_


	5. Urgent

A/N: Music for Chapter 5 was _Meant To Die_ by The Used. Sorry, this is a rather short one.

* * *

Chapter 5: Urgent

The quick, urgent beeping of the heart monitor beat against Juushiro's half-sleeping brain. He pushed himself up onto his elbows, eyes flying to the small machine next to the bed. Though he was no medical expert, Juushiro could see the number zero flashing on the small screen. With speed he rarely used, Juushiro leapt from Shunsui's unmoving side, raced through the door and down the hall to where Unohana was already hurrying towards him.

"I felt his reiatsu drop," she said as they half-ran back to Shunsui's room, "What happened?"

"I don't know!" Juushiro cried helplessly, "I fell asleep, the heart monitor woke me up..." Unohana nodded and rushed through the still-open door, hurrying to Shunsui's side. The injured student looked, Juushiro noticed now, rather gray- a very unhealthy color. Worried beyond measure, Juushiro dropped into a chair and watched as Unohana worked over the too-still form, hardly daring to think of any of the possibilities that could arise from this.

Frantic minutes full of white-robed medical personnel, the beeping of machines and Unohana's ever-calm voice passed before Juushiro's vacant eyes. He couldn't bear to hope or despair; condemned to wait for some sign from Unohana. It was all too much. The worry and potential loss was building up inside him, stretching his control very thin.

Unable to watch any longer, the white-haired student stormed out of the room, down the hall, into the courtyard, down the dirty alley, onto the hilltop that opened onto the Rukongai. The sun had just risen; the grass was still wet with dew. Juushiro sat heavily under his favorite tree, a sprawling ginkgo. He drew his knees up to his chest and rested his head on them, drawing in deep breaths of morning air. His vision blurred with tears and he hid his face, ashamed; though there was no one to see him here but the birds and occasional animal.

He hated this, the fear, the uncertainty, the worry that gnawed at him endlessly. Now that their places were reversed, he understood better now, how Shunsui felt when Juushiro himself was sick. It was awful, seeing someone you loved so close to death. Knowing you couldn't follow them, if they went.

Juushiro felt an approaching spiritual pressure and hurried to wipe his eyes. It wouldn't do for anyone to see him like this.

"Ukitake-kun?" A nurse he'd never seen before spoke hesitantly from just behind him. "Unohana-san asked me to come get you. She says there's news." Biting his lip slightly, Juushiro followed her back to the infirmary.

When he returned to the hospital room, Juushiro found Unohana administering kidou to Shunsui's torso. The heart monitor was beeping steadily, he saw with immense relief. He crossed the room quickly and stood beside the bed, opposite Unohana. She didn't look up until the kidou had faded from her fingertips.

A tired smile warmed her features as she gestured to the chair behind him. "Please, sit." He complied and she pulled another chair around to sit beside him.

"How is he?" Juushiro couldn't keep the question down; his initial relief that Shunsui was alive had worn off, to be replaced by worry again.

"He's alive, as you can see," Unohana replied gently, "There was bleeding in his brain. I didn't see it because of the concussion." Guilt creased her brow momentarily. "But we've stopped it now, and he's stable. I was able to heal him some more, as well."

"Will he wake up?" Juushiro asked hesitantly.

"I don't know," Unohana said after a moment. "His condition is fragile, so... there's no way to tell. But if he doesn't wake up in the next day..." Juushiro looked at her in anguish, not wanting to hear this new ultimatum but needing to know the conditions.

"I'm sorry," she said quietly, "If he doesn't wake up soon... He never will. He'll be like this forever, as far as I can tell." Juushiro nodded numbly and looked down, eyes stinging. To never truly wake up... That was the same as dying, he thought. He had one more day to hope, and then that hope would be fulfilled or shattered. The way things were looking at this point, the most likely path seemed to be shattering.


	6. Awake, Alive, Again

A/N: Music for this final chapter was _Prelude 12/21 _by AFI and _Lake of Silver Bells _by Carbon Leaf for the last bit.

* * *

Chapter 6: Awake, Alive, Again

Shunsui woke almost without realizing it, gradually becoming aware of machines beeping near his ear. Well, that was odd. And where was Juushiro, shaking him awake just in time for class? Puzzled, he opened his eyes to find the answer.

It all came rushing back as he took in the white walls and bed. He was in the infirmary, recovering from his injuries. But he had opened his eyes. Did that mean...? Hardly daring to hope, he wiggled his toes, then his fingers. Overjoyed, Shunsui tried to sit up but found a piercing pain lance across his chest as he tried to use the muscles there. He laid back down slowly, wincing. So moving a lot wasn't such a great idea. But he could move!

His eyes roamed until he saw Juushiro, asleep in a chair that had been pulled close to the bed. There were dark circles under his eyes, his uniform was rumpled and his hair looked as though it had gone uncombed for several days. Shunsui supposed that was because Juushiro had been here, with him, for awhile now. A twinge of guilt pricked him at that realization.

In trying, he found that he could reach out to touch the sleeping student. It was an effort; his muscles felt rubbery and resistant from lack of use. Still, Shunsui managed to brush Juushiro's knee, waking him. _He must not have been sleeping very deeply, _Shunsui mused worriedly.

Juushiro opened his eyes quickly and immediately saw that Shunsui's were open as well, and that the dark-haired student was looking up at him. His face was still a bit gray and there were lines there that hadn't existed before; but it was relief to see him awake and alive and looking better.

"You woke up," Juushiro whispered unnecessarily.

"Yeah..." Shunsui found his voice hoarse and raspy, also from lack of use. He cleared his throat in frustration, then smiled up at Juushiro. "Thank you for staying..."

"How do you know how long I've been here?" Juushiro asked, mystified.

"I could hear everything... When I wasn't asleep..." Shunsui answered mischievously.

"Oh. Were you asleep when Unohana said..." Juushiro stopped himself. "Never mind."

"What did she say?" Shunsui pressed him.

"She..." Juushiro looked down, unhappy to be reliving this memory, "She said you had a day to wake up. And if you didn't..." He shut his eyes tightly, not wanting to think about that possibility now that it was in the past.

Shunsui watched him sympathetically for a moment and, seeing that he couldn't continue, tugged at his sleeve. "Come here..."

Juushiro obeyed almost numbly, climbing into the hospital bed next to Shunsui. He rested his head against Shunsui's shoulder and curled close to his warmth, trying to collect himself. Shunsui was alive, and awake. That was what mattered, right?

Shunsui stroked the silky, tangled white hair gently; finger-combing out all the knots and snarls. "It's okay..." he murmured softly, cradling Juushiro close, "I'm okay..."

"You're injured," Juushiro whispered.

"But I'll get better..." Shunsui reassured him, "I promise..."

Juushiro nodded, taking comfort in the promise, no matter how empty it might really be. He knew, deep down, that healing wasn't guaranteed, yet that wasn't enough to dampen his growing relief.

"Your mother was here," Juushiro said, trying to fill the frightening silence. He needed to hear Shunsui's voice, keep reassuring himself that this was real.

Shunsui's voice took on a steely edge, "I know... I was awake for that part..."

"I'm sorry. I think I offended her," Juushiro said sheepishly.

"It doesn't matter... A little offense might do her good..." Shunsui said carelessly.

"Sui..."

"What...?"

"You shouldn't write her off so quickly. She _is_ your mother."

"And you heard what she said about me."

"I know she loves you," Juushiro mused, "In some part of her heart, she still cares what happens to you."

"Humph," was Shunsui's eloquent reply, and then: "I'll believe it when I see it." Juushiro smiled to himself, knowing that it was a start.

* * *

A few weeks later, Shunsui was released from the infirmary. He was more or less healed, but still under strict orders from Unohana. "No strenuous movement, no combat and _no sake_," had been her parting words. Juushiro, for his part, intended to enforce those orders. Though the "no strenuous movement" clause might become a problem.

Shunsui was overjoyed at being allowed to leave the infirmary. Though he had Juushiro to amuse him, the steady stream of homework combined with the unchanging room had become very tiresome. He was willing, but not content, to follow Unohana's orders. But that was more out of fear than anything else. She could be a scary girl, when she tried.

Since he was released on a weekend, Shunsui was able to spend two days alone with Juushiro before classes were resumed. They sat under Juushiro's favorite tree, the ginkgo, all day; talking, laughing, occasionally kissing. To be able to walk again was the most wonderful thing in the world to Shunsui, even if he still had to use a crutch. His left leg, the one that had been broken, was still healing, according to Unohana.

The school sent word of Shunsui's recovery to his mother, though they never received a reply. Shunsui was glad of this, because it meant he didn't have to think about her. Especially not about the fact that he might have been wrong about how little she cared.

Since he had woken up, Shunsui had told Juushiro about all his dreams and what it was like to be in a coma. Juushiro had, in turn, informed Shunsui how worried he'd been and how there must never be a scare like that again. Shunsui had laughed and promised to try his best.

And so Shunsui's physical injuries and Juushiro's emotional ones gradually healed; school and training continued. They graduated, moved through the ranks of the Gotei 13, became captains; their lives played out, ever entwined. Yet they never forgot what they took away from the experience of Shunsui's coma. Juushiro retained the empathy he held for Shunsui when his disease attacked, now knowing what it was like for the flamboyant man. Shunsui retained, eventually, a better relationship with his mother and, less eventually, better battle tactics.

_Fin~_


End file.
